Matter Over Mind
by Miss Astrid Johnston
Summary: When Ryuichi becomes unexpectedley sick, Shuichi is there to support his idol through all of the pain. But through the course of the long night and Ryu's intense stomach pain, the two slowly find that they have become more than just best friends.


"Chirp… chirp… chirp…"

The crickets sounded that August evening in the park.

Ryuichi was sitting on a bench, just looking at the stars and holding his ever-present companion, Kumagoro, closely. Ryuichi wanted Shuichi. He didn't know why, exactly. As he sat out at the park bench, he felt… lonely. Even with his precious pink rabbit there, he still felt lonesome. The moon was out that night, glowing beautifully behind the clouds. And then, as if his prayers were answered, he heard somebody walking up to him.

"Shuichi?" Ryuichi said softly.

"Ryu-kun! Hi there!" Shuichi said cheerfully. "How are you?" He sat down with that adorable smile plastered on his face.

"I had a bad day…" Ryu confessed sadly. Shuichi's eyebrows raised; this wasn't like his friend.

"Aww… tell me what happened." Shuichi asked with sympathy, scooting closer next to Ryuichi.

"Well… the band had a photo shoot, and there was this photographer. He made me stand in a waterfall, and I got really wet and cold. Then he told me to lean on a tree and look serious, so I tried to but I was still shaky. Then I heard a buzzing noise and there was a bee right next to me. I got scared so I jumped back, and then he yelled at me so I got back to leaning. Then the bee stung me, and it hurt a lot."

Shuichi listened closely, wrapping his arm around his friend.

"Then I started to cry because it hurt, and the photographer yelled at me because I was acting like a stupid little kid, but it hurt, Shuichi. Then Tohma heard him and told him to go away, and he helped me pull out the stinger but it hurt and it bled a lot. Then he fired the photographer, so it made me feel better." Ryuichi finished. Shuichi compassionately gave him a hug.

"Poor thing… I'm sorry. That photographer was mean, he deserved to get fired." Shuichi said.

"But I feel better. How about you? Did you have a good day?" Ryuichi asked. Shuichi nodded cheerfully.

"Yep! There was a sale on strawberry Pocky and our band finished 5 whole songs!" Shuichi declared with pride. He held up a box of the infamous strawberry Pocky out for Ryu.

"Want some?" He asked. Ryuichi shook his head, no.

"I already had something to eat, thanks." He said politely.

"Hm? What did you have?" Shuichi asked.

"Well, the photographer was really sorry for how he acted because he was under a lot of stress that day, so he made us a cake. I had two slices a while ago. It tasted really good and it had blue frosting." Ryuichi explained.

"Oooh, was is pretty looking?" Shuichi asked with sparkling eyes. Ryuichi nodded.

"But Noriko told me about how I shouldn't eat it and stuff. But she just worries a lot." He added. Sighing, Ryu fell back onto the bench and looked up at the sky.

"The moon's really pretty… it's just rising up, and it's gold." Ryuichi said thoughtfully. Shuichi nodded.

"Yeah, it really is." He replied.

"So have you read this thing called fanfiction?" Shuichi asked curiously. "They take anime and write stories based on it."

"Actually, I have I met someone who wrote it. Her pen name was Imariichan and she was walking around town. Then, she fell down accidentally and hurt her foot. I helped her back to a bench so she could call a friend to help. She had a blue notebook and a mechanical pencil, and she drew lotsa pictures. She even drew a picture of me." Ryuichi said.

"Wow… sounds cool. And then she was at an anime convention when she laughed and spit up soda through her nose. That was really funny!" Shuichi said with a laugh.

"Yeah, her friend made her laugh. That was Luft, I think. A buddy of Imariichan's. They met in the sixth grade and were best friends for a long time, or so I heard. Luft is really good at coloring things." Ryuichi explained. Then he jumped as if he had an idea.

"What if Imariichan drew manga and then Luft colored it in? It'd be like a colored manga!" Ryuichi exclaimed.

"Hm… ha ha! I dunno, that sounds boring. I like black and white manga so I can color it in!" Shuichi smiled happily at the thought of the scent of colored pencils and crayons and manga pages.

"Maybe they can release colored and black and white manga." Ryuichi assumed.

"That'd be really neat!" Shuichi replied. Ryuichi sat back down and sighed contentedly. Nobody spoke for a few minutes.

"Ryu…? You okay?" Shuichi asked. "You're awful quiet."

"I feel weird…" Ryuichi said, his head rolling onto Shuichi's shoulder.

"Huh? Weird? How so?" Shuichi asked worriedly.

"I feel kind of… floaty… spaced out, like I'm not here, but still here… maybe it's this thing called alternate reality…" Ryu said in detail. Shuichi cocked his head in confusion.

"Hm…"

"Maybe it's allergies… or that cake" Ryu assumed.

"You have allergies?" Shuichi asked, surprised and a bit worried.

"Tohma said it was a special kind of allergy, where it's unexpected and it doesn't happen much. But it happened once… I drank some of this milk because we were out of this one kind, so we bought another from this old supermarket. Then, I was allergic to it, so I felt upset and hot and my head ached and I was dizzy… it was really bad, because Tohma said I had to get it out of my body or else I'd get sicker… so I had to stick my finger all the way down my throat and then throw up the milk…" Ryuichi said with a shudder. He wrapped his arms around Shuichi, feeling almost fearful. Shuichi returned the hug, holding his friend closely.

"That might be the case with that cake. Do you want to go to a doctor and have it checked out?" Shuichi asked worriedly. Ryuichi shied a little and held Kumagoro to his chest.

"Uhm… I dunno…" He said meekly, not liking the thought of doctors.

"You might need to, Ryu. You don't want all of that to happen again, do you?" Shuichi asked with concern and kindness in his voice. Ryuichi glanced at Shuichi a few times.

"Can you drive there…?" Ryuichi asked. Shuichi nodded.

"Of course I can! I _am_ 19, you know." Shuichi said proudly, holding up his driver's license for proof. "My car's just over here. I'll give you shotgun." Shuichi opened the door and let Ryuichi inside, and then got in the drivers seat.

"Do you know of any offices or clinics?" Shuichi asked.

"There's one right down the street…" Ryuichi said.

"Excellent. That'll do just fine." Shuichi said, driving down a few blocks. The road was bumpy, like that of a dirt road. Ryuichi was nervous; Shuichi could tell. The way his hands clenched and unclenched around Kumagoro was obvious enough. Had he had a bad experience with doctors before? Shuichi wondered.

After a relatively short drive, the two arrived at the hospital.

"It's okay. I'll let you hold my hand if you're nervous." Shuichi said as they got out of the car. Ryu nodded shyly, holding Shuichi's hand as they walked inside the clinic.

"How may I help you this evening?" A kind, rather large woman asked at the counter.

"Um, we need to schedule a brief appointment for Ryuichi Sakuma." Shuichi said, stepping up to the counter with Ryu close behind.

"Okay then… room number 4 with Dr. Molly Nagaoto." The woman said. "You may go."

"Thank you very much, ma'am. C'mon, Ryu." Shuichi said as Ryuichi followed close behind, holding Kumagoro and Shuichi's hand. Shuichi walked inside to see a girl who looked about 14. She had auburn hair and looked at the two through her glasses.

"Um… will the doctor be in soon?" Shuichi asked, sitting down with Ryuichi, assuming the girl was an intern.

"I _am_ the doctor." The girl said, pointing at her identification tag and college degree. Shuichi blushed.

"Oh, I'm so sorry." He said apologetically.

"It's fine. The mistake has been made by many, so it's okay."Dr. Nagaoto replied. "So, what seems to be the problem?"

"This is Ryuichi Sakuma. I think something is wrong with him. Could you help him? Please?" Shuichi asked. He leaned over and whispered to Ryuichi, "Don't be scared." Ryuichi nodded shyly.

Dr. Nagaoto adjusted her glasses. "Yes I can. Is Mr. Sakuma feeling ill this evening?"

"Well, Ryuichi-kun ate some cake we think he might be allergic to…" Shuichi explained.

"I see. I'll need to ask some questions. Does he know the source from which the cake was made? From his file of medical history and conditions, he had an unidentifiable allergy routine year round to certain substances." Dr. Nagaoto said.

Ryuichi nodded. "I dunno where the cake was made from… but I got stung by a bee this afternoon, if that matters."

"And the guy who made it for him gave it to him as an apology for a bad photo shoot… it might have been in the icing, because it was blue." Shuichi held Ryu's hand tighter. "Will he be okay?"

Dr. Nagaoto thought for a brief moment. "Blue icing is common… there's a 100 percent chance that the main problem was in the food coloring. The only brand of food coloring that is colored blue contains the exact same pure substance as what Mr. Sakuma here is allergic to. That being the case, then we may need to do a stomach pump or give him a dose of Ipecac."

Ryuichi squeezed Shuichi's hand. "What are those?" He asked timidly.

"Is it going to hurt him? You're not gonna hurt Ryu." Shuichi said, and actually stood defensively in front of Ryuichi.

"There is no need to worry. A stomach pump is a process in which a thin tube is inserted down the patients throat, and the contents of the stomach are transferred into a bag hooked up to the tube, like that of an IV case. Ipecac is a medicine that makes the patient vomit and regurgitates all contents of the stomach, which might prove to add some minor abdominal discomfort, but is DMA approved and prescription sold. The stomach pump is costly, however. I would recommend the Ipecac dosage, which is actually less complicated and quicker." Dr. Nagaoto explained.

Ryuichi squirmed uneasily at the sound of the Ipecac, remembering that bad night with Tohma and the milk. Shuichi turned to look at Ryuichi.

"Do you want to do either?" He asked, while thinking "_Is there a choice_?"

"W-well, we don't have a lot of money with us right now… so maybe we should get the medicine." Ryuichi said uneasily.

"Are you sure? I'll be there right next to you, if you need me." Shuichi comforted. Ryuichi nodded.

"Yeah, final decision."

"I see. Given the fact that you're in a spontaneous situation, I'll send the medical bill in a week." Dr. Nagaoto explained, pulling out a bottle of Ipecac and handing it to Shuichi to hold. "Thank you for your patience."

Shuichi held the medicine bottle tightly. "You're gonna be okay, Ryu…" Ryuichi looked up at Shuichi.

"Shu… can we go home? I want to take the medicine at my house." Ryuichi asked softly. Shuichi smiled.

"Yeah Ryu, you deserve the best right now. Let's go." Shuichi got up and walked out with Ryuichi.

After they left the clinic, Shuichi gave Ryuichi a soft, loving hug. Ryuichi hugged him back.

"Okay, so, your place?" Shuichi asked, getting on the other side of the car. Ryuichi nodded.

"Okay." Shuichi buckled himself in, and started the car once Ryuichi was fastened in. "I hope the medicine will make you better."

"The doctor sounded like she knew what she was doing… I think I'll be okay after this…" Ryuichi responded as he sat quietly in the car, holding Kumagoro to his chest.

"That is true. Just tell me if you need anything though, okay?" Shuichi said kindly.

"Kay…" Ryuichi nodded. "Shuichi?" Shuichi looked over from his side of the car.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you, for being such a great friend." Ryuichi said. Shuichi smiled.

"No Ryu, thank you! Once you're better, I'll have to take out to a park or something so we can just hang out and have fun." Shuichi said kindly and energetically.

"That sounds really nice Shuichi.. I'd like that. Thanks." Ryuichi replied. The drive there was short, much to Ryuichi's anxiety. He wished the drive could've been longer. Shuichi pulled up to Ryu's house, and stopped the car. He got out and walked to Ryuichi's side, opening the door.

"You look tired Ryu… we're at your place now. If you need any help, I'm right here." Shuichi offered. Ryuichi got out and walked to the front door of his house.

"Thanks Shuichi… I am tired. When I take the medicine… will you be there to help me through the… y'know… effects?" Ryuichi asked shyly. Shuichi smiled.

"Of course!" He held out his hand. "Come on, I'll help you before you're even in the house."

Ryuichi obediently took Shuichi's hand as they walked inside Ryu's rather large house.

"I have the medicine in my pocket. You wanna take the medicine in the restroom, you know… because… you know?" Shuichi asked uneasily as they stepped inside the house.

"Uh-huh…" Ryuichi said quietly.

"Okay… uhm, where's your restroom?" Shuichi said, blushing furiously. Ryuichi couldn't help but smile a little.

"Down this hallway." He replied, thinking in the back of his mind how cute Shuichi looked. He was overcome by a spell of light dizziness, and felt both dread and excitement of taking the medicine and getting the substance out of his system.

"Need some help?" Shuichi asked, holding out his hand.

"Yeah… I'm getting kinda dizzy…" Ryuichi replied, taking Shuichi's hand. Then, Shuichi wanted to loosen up the atmosphere, so he put an arm around Ryu's shoulders and gave him an easing, yet energetic grin.

"Don't worry Ryu, you're gonna be fine!" He said in a cheerful and soft voice. Ryuichi, feeling some of the tension ease up and believing in Shuichi's words, smiled back.

"Okay." He replied, holding the bathroom door open. "Oh, Ryu, what exactly did the doctor say it would do?" He asked, thinking worriedly about the side effects. Ryuichi stiffened.

"S-she said it'd make me throw up… and it might hurt…" Tears formed in Ryuichi's eyes and he shook with fear.

"Awww, Ryu, don't cry. If it hurts, I'll still be right there next to you." Shuichi said comfortingly. Ryuichi sniffled, wiping his eyes with the front of his hand.

"That makes me feel a little better, Shu." Ryuichi replied, still feeling scared. Shuichi pulled out the medicine, and handed it to Ryuichi with a soft smile. Ryuichi took it anxiously, and read the back.

"It says I'm supposed to drink it all down… it doesn't look that big. I think I can do it." He said nervously. The bottle was about 8 fluid ounces.

"Oh, I hope it tastes good. Medicine that tastes bad is so yucky…" Shuichi said with an "icky" look on his face. Ryu unscrewed the top, and took a test sniff.

"It doesn't smell too bad… it smells kind of syrup-y." Ryuichi breathed in deeply, and drank the bottle down in one go. After he finished it, he set the empty bottle down and waited.

Shuichi rested a hand on Ryuichi's back and waited, hoping and praying it wouldn't hurt his best friend.

Ryuichi waited. And waited. And waited. Two minutes had passed and nothing happened. He felt so nervous... would it hurt him a lot? He had a feeling that this would not be a fun night.

Shuichi bit his lower lip. "Is... is is working?" He questioned, as if it weren't already quite obvious.

Ryuichi waited, feeling nothing.

"I.... I'm not sure-" he was stopped short when he felt his stomach lurch.

He dove head-first into the toilet, heaving and vomiting painfully. Tears leaked freely down his face while he gripped the porcelain bowl until his knuckles turned white. He tried to dismiss the pain, but it was so prominent and agonizing. He felt the icing come up within the first few retches, thankfully. The pink haired performer backed up before the first bit of food came back up. He was covering his own mouth, looking like he would have thrown up too if he had not looked away. But he came closer to Ryuichi after he had stopped vomiting… for now. And put his hand on the man's shoulders.

"Ryu, are you okay?"

Ryuichi flushed, being in so much pain that he missed the lever a few times. "O-ow... Shuichi... i-it hurts... really bad..." His voice shook as he wrapped his arms around his abdomen, on the verge of tears. "It really really hurts..."

"Ryu!" Shuichi whimpered, putting his left arm around Ryuichi's stomach, holding onto Ryu's hand at the same time. "Lay down, okay? Where's the couch or bed?" He asked, using his right hand to rub Ryu's back, as if he thought it might help.

"I-in the other room..." Ryuichi said through a shaky voice. "S-Shu... I'm so sorry... t-that was so n-nasty..."

"Don't be sorry!" Shuichi cried, guiding Ryuichi to the other room.

"O-okay..." Ryuichi rested himself on the bed in his room, finally managing to settle down. The soft bed sheets put him at ease a little as he sighed. Just as he felt the pain ebb away, he felt the agony return by at least threefold.

_"ITAAII!" _He cried out, doubling over instantly. Hot tears poured down his face as he whimpered and wept in utter agony. He had never felt something this painful before in his entire life.

Shuichi gasped, a concerned look flooding over his face. "Ryu! What's wrong?" He rushed to Ryu's side, reaching for Ryu's hand.

"O-ow... my s-stomach hurts a lot... w-worse tha before... r-really really bad, Shuichi..." Ryuichi squeezed Shuichi's hand, crying in agony. "I've... n-never felt this b-bad ever... ow, it hurts so much, Shuichi...!"

Shuichi bit his lip to keep from crying himself. He took out his cell phone and dialed the number for the clinic. "Okay, I'm calling the doctor, we'll fix this!" He promised, scared just to look at Ryu. If Ryuichi was in pain, it pained him just to look at him. He didn't want is idol to be hurting!

Ryuichi nodded, holding Shuichi's hand tightly as he tried not to sob.

"Sakura-Yama Clinic, Dr. Nagaoto speaking." Dr. Nagaoto spoke on the other line in a normal tone.

Shuichi held on to Ryu's hand just as tightly. "Hello? Ryuichi Sakuma was just there. After he took the medicine, Ryuichi-kun's stomach started hurting really bad." He explained, looking at Ryuchi encouragingly.

"I understand. Sakuma Ryuichi, having being diagnosed with an allergy to food coloring. The reason for such pains is in the fact that the Ipecac is made to irritate the mucosa of the stomach, thus causing vomiting. Pain is a common side effect, no matter what the severity. You should let it run its course, meaning do not give him any painkillers. There is no point, seeing that they will just be regurgitated. Ideal treatment is a heating pad or an electric blanket to be applied to the stomach, and to tell him to relax or do anything to mentally comfort him. The pattern of vomiting and cramps will last through the thick of the night, as does it normally." Dr. Nagaoto thoroughly explained.

"Oh, thank you!" Shuichi said, "I'll call back if it gets worse." He added before hanging up, looking around the room. "Hey, Ryu, is there a heat pad or blacket or something we can put on your stomach? The doctor lady said it would help." Shuichi smiled, still holding onto Ryu's hand.

___"I-I think... there's one... in t-the closet." Ryuichi said, holding Shuichi's hand tightly. A few stray tears fell from his cheeks as the pain continued to make itself known._

"Okay..." Shuichi said, looking over to the closet and letting the fact that he'd have to let go of Ryuichi's hand for a minute to get the blanket sink in. He carefully slipped his hand away, making a fast trip to the closet and ruffling through it to find the blanket, which was partially stuck under a large box. After a minute of pulling and falling on his butt, Shuichi finally got the blanket out, returning to his dear friend, feeling guilty for taking so long. He tucked Ryuichi in like he would a child, then set the temperature on medium.

"Sorry i-it was stuck..." Ryuichi apologized as he felt the blanket heat up around him. He tried to pretend like he didn't feel as bad as before, but he still felt that same ache. Ryuichi felt guilty that he had Shuichi doing all of this for him, when the pink haired singer could have been enjoying himself at Yuki's apartment. He just felt bad about himself, like it was his fault. He had eaten the cake in the first place, even when Noriko told him not to, and he just felt terrible about himself. While immersed in these thoughts, he cried and subconsciously muttered words like, "I'm sorry" and "it's all my fault".

"No, don't be sorry, Ryu!" Shuichi said, grabbing Ryuichi's hand again and sitting down on the edge of the bed. "It's not your fault." He promised, smiling at Ryuichi."If you need anything, just tell me."

Ryuichi nodded, feeling consoled by Shuichi's words. "Shu...?" He asked timidly.

"Yes?" Shuichi asked, smiling, ready to help his friend.

"I think I need to be sick again."

"Okay, you want help to the bathroom? Should I go get a towel or trash bag or something?" Shuichi asked, standing up quickly, concerned.

Ryuichi felt the bile rise up. He couldn't control it. Oh God, he was going to be sick all over the floor. He felt terrible, absolutely, horrifically terrible. Shuichi ran from the room, looking for a trash can. But to his horror…

Ryuichi couldn't contain it, as much as he tried. He gagged, and tried to swallow the bile back down. It burned his throat, so he cried out and vomited all over the floor helplessly. Like he had no control of his body any longer. Some of the bile was still stuck in his throat, which felt absolutely awful and triggered intense nausea. He coughed and gagged harshly, feeling low and pathetic.

Shuichi ran back in with a small trash bin, setting it by the bedside, but was to late. "Oh, Ryu, I'm so sorry about this!" Shuichi said, "I'll go get a towel and clean the mess!" He rushed back out of the room, sort of glad to leave the smell of vomit, but he still hurriedly searched for a towel and other cleaning stuff.

Ryuichi couldn't take it. He felt so terrible. Before was bad enough, but now this? Now he couldn't even control himself? Now Shuichi had to clean up his own bile? He still felt the awful smell and burning in the back of his throat, and continued to cough, trying to get out the taste. "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry..." Ryuichi said repeatedly.

Shuichi came back with two towels and some air freshener. "Shhhh, Ryu, you might throw up again!" He teased, smiling at Ryu before getting on his hands and knees to clean up the mess. "Don't be so hard on yourself! It was the cake and the mean camera guy!" Shuichi said.

"I-I know... I should've paid to do t-the stomach pump instead... b-but I didn't listen to Noriko when she warned me... God, I'm such a mess...." Ryuichi sighed. "B-but... please, forgive me... even though I don't deserve it..."

"Don't be like that, Ryu!" Shuichi said, standing up and tossing the dirty towel in the laundry basket, having finished cleaning up. "It's not your fault, I already told you. I'm happy to help you!" Shuichi said, grinning at Ryuichi to cheer him up. He sprayed the air freshener a couple of times, and then leaned next to Shuichi's bedside.

"Hey, would you like to draw some? It might help to keep your mind off the pain." He said kindly.

Shuichi's words came out to Ryuichi, and he understood finally. It wasn't his fault, it was an accident. He looked up at Shuichi at the idea of drawing. "Yeah, and you can draw with me if you wanna." He replied with a soft smile.

"Yay!" Shuichi cheered, running from one place to the next, coming back with paper, crayons, glue and some sparkles. "We can make it sparkly now!!" Shuichi smiled, proud of himself for finding the sparkles.

Ryuichi's face lit up as he saw everything that Shuichi had brought. "Oh wow! Thanks Shu!" Ryu said with a smile.

"And look!" Shuichi held up a wide book. "So you can stay in bed and color on a flat surface!" He said, handing Ryuichi a box of crayons and paper and the sparkles. "We can draw us!"

"Wow! Great thinking! Thanks a whole bunch, Shuichi." Ryuichi said with cheerfulness in his voice. It was convenient, too, because he really didn't want to leave his position.

Shuichi smiled, taking out a green crayon and starting to color what looked like hair on the paper.

Ryuichi happily drew Shuichi, starting with the pink crayon for the hair and ending with the black and gold shoes and a smile on his friend's face. For detail, he put a very small spot of glue on Shuichi's eyes, and lightly sprinkled violet sparkles on his eyes, so they shined as they caught the light softly, yet energetically.

Shuichi smiled, hiding his coloring carefully before he finished. In the end, he had several crayons spread over the ground, and he held up his picture proudly. It looked like a second grader had drawn it, but you could still see Ryuichi and Shuichi on a stage, singing and holding hands. "Look, Ryu! It's us!" He smiled happily.

Ryuichi gazed at the picture, amazed and very happy. "Aww, that's so cool! I really like it! Great job!" He complimented. In turn, he held up his picture. It was Ryu and Shu, sitting on a park bench, holding ice cream in one hand, and holding hands in the other. There was a streetlight that provided the light, and Ryu had carefully illustrated the moon behind them, sprinkling it with gold sparkles. He put some sparkles on random spots in the dark blue sky, indicating the stars. His was about the same as Shuichi's but you could tell that he put a lot of heart into it. He grinned.

"Awwww, Ryu!" Shuichu cried, beaming and blushing, "It's beautiful!!" Shuichi stared at the picture, imagining it actually coming true. He did sort of like Ryu... but he thought Yuki would be angry... "It's sparkly!"

"Thanks a lot, Shu!" Ryu said with a smile. "I'm glad you like it!"

"We should hang out more often!" Shuichi suggested, smiling at Ryuichi.

"Yeah, it feels like forever since I've seen you..." Ryuichi said. His mind drifted off to an empty feeling he's had for a while. Tohma had found romance in Noriko, so they had been going out for a while. Ryuichi felt... lonely. Even with Kumagoro as his companion, he still felt alone. He really did want to see Shuichi more often. He felt like he needed a friend.

"Yeah- wait, where's Kumagoro?" Shu asked.

Ryuichi was surprised- how could he have forgotten his ever present companion? "I think he's in the living room..." He said.

"I'll get him, if you want..." Shuichi offered, standing up.

"Thank you, Shuichi. I'd like that." Ryuichi replied, blushing.

"Awww, " Shuichi blushed just as deep as Ryuichi, "You're so cute when you blush!" She sqeaked, then ran from the room to look for Kumagoro.

Ryuichi smiled. Was he cute? He blushed even more deeply, but suddenly felt tired. He pondered taking a nap a little later.

Shuichi looked around the living room. He didn't see the plush pink bunny anywhere. Not in the chairs, not under the sofa, not on the floor... He rushed back to the bedroom, but only peered in to see Ryu looking sleepy. He sank a little and turned around to continue his search for the Kumagoro. Ryuichi saw him, but his head became foggy and tired. Yawning, he closed his eyes, quietly drifting off to sleep.

Ryuichi had a restless sleep. He kept having strange dreams where he felt unpleasant and afraid, but he didn't know why. He stood in a fog, lonely and lost. He kept on calling for Shuichi, but he didn't come. Nobody came. He was all alone, and scared. Not knowing what else to do, he just crumpled to the floor and cried. He didn't know why he felt so sad, but he just did. Shuichi noticed the other man in bed moving in his sleep. He couldn't tell what was happening, or whether it was bad or not, but he didn't know if he should wake his friend. Ryuichi had been hurting, and Shuichi didn't want that to happen again, but he was afraid that Ryu was still feeling the hurt. He stood on his knees, looking at Ryu's face. He didn't look happy. But... uncomfortable.

"Ryu...?" He whispered, placing his hand on his friend's cheek.

Ryuichi was still alone in the dream. Completely alone. Nobody was there. Not even Kumagoro. He looked up, only to see thunderclouds rolling in. An extremely loud clap of thunder awoke him out of his dream state. Ryuichi woke up instantly, yelping and covering his ears.

"Ryu!" Shuichi had a completely worried look all over his face. "What happened? Are you okay??" He said quickly, concern dripping form his words, knowing that he should have looked around for Kumagoro a little harder.

Ryuichi's breath slowed down, and he put his arms down. "S-sorry, Shuichi... I just have really bad dreams whenever I get sick..." He said, suddenly feeling very warm for some reason. He panted heavily, as if he had just finished running a marathon. His face was pale, but his cheeks were flushed.

"Ryu, you don't look so good... should I call the doctor back?" Shu asked. (Iay! One-liner...)

"N-nuh-uh... i-it's okay..." Ryuichi said, shivering. "S-sometimes... my body temperature j-just kinda..." Ryu stopped in mid sentence, and thankfully found the trashcan, and threw up for the third time that night. He still felt nauseous, and couldn't do anything but dry-heave and gag, which hurt him even more. After finishing, he collapsed onto the bed, exhausted.

Shuichi looked like a sad little puppy. He didn't want to see his friend hurt. And worse; he couldn't make it stop. "Ryu, I'll be right back!" Shuichi had a sudden idea, and then went to search for Kumagoro again. It was the least he could do.

Ryuichi felt thankful that Shuichi was there, because to be honest, he had no idea as to how he would manage by himself. He kept in mind to say thanks to Shuichi later. For the second time, this time more careful, Shuichi looked for Kumagoro. He searched over every inch of the house until...

"Ryu! Look!" Shuichi held up a big pink bunny plushie. "It's Kumagoro!" He said, grinning as he rushed to Ryuichi Sakuma's bedside.

"Ah, Kuma-chan!" Ryu's face lit up as he took his once-lost companion into his arms, cuddling him closely. "I'm so sorry I was gone!" He looked up at Shuichi. "Thank you so much, Shuichi. For everything, I really really appreciate it! You've been such a great friend, to me."

"No, Ryu," Shuichi argued, "You're a great friend!" He got on his knees, resting his arms and head on the bed and gazed at his friends.

Ryuichi smiled, but then cocked his head in confusion at Shuichi's position. "Shu? You can sit next to me if you wanna. The bed's much more comfy than the floor." He offered.

Shuichi's face went pinker than his hair. "Oh, okay, thanks." He smiled back, sitting next to Ryuichi on the bed. "But, aren't you tired?"

Ryuichi blushed, but, being in the state of foggy consciousness that he was, he got over his shyness to say, "It might me help sleep a little better if you're there."

"Oh," Shuichi looked away quickly, his face sure to be burning red. He was smiling. "Then I'll stay with you all night.

"Thanks Shuichi. I'd really like that." Ryuichi replied.

Shuichi bowed his head and bit his bottom lip, reaching for Ryuichi's hand again. He wasn't about to leave the room anytime soon again. "Ryu? Can I ask you a question?"

Ryuichi took Shuichi's hand, worried about why Shuichi wouldn't show his face. "Sure. What is it, Shuichi? Is something wrong?"

"Never mind." Shuichi smiled to himself. He felt so secure and love when he held Ryuichi's hand. He didn't feel the same with Yuki... "Nothing's wrong."

"Shuichi... if something's wrong, you can tell me. You know that... right?" Ryuichi said, leaning over to see Shuichi's face. "It's okay if something's wrong." Then he thought for a little while, and asked again. "Is it about Yuki?"

"No, no, it's okay. Everything is fine." Shuichi told Ryuichi, looking at Ryu. He put on his best fake smile and blinked back any tears that pushed to be let out of the dam. He couldn't have Ryuichi worry about, and especially not while Ryu-kun was sick! "Are you tired?"

"A little, but not as much as I'm worried about you." He said. Now, Ryuichi may be childish and naive, but he had a knack for telling out lies from truths, and fake smiles from sad faces. "Something's wrong. You can tell me if you wanna. Or, if you can't say it, you can write it out."

"Ryu!" Shuichi went pink again, looking into Ryichi's eyes, looking determined, anxious and excited. "I-I... I think I like you." He whispered.

Ryuichi felt bliss flow out from his heart. That empty, lonely feeling dissappeared. He gasped, his face lightning up. "You do? Shuichi... I don't know what to say... I feel so happy! I like you too, you know that. I just didn't realize it at first." He pulled Shuichi into a hug, smiling.

Shuichi fell willingly into the hug. "Really? You really like me to?" He asked, smiling again. But what would Yuki think? And what about the about 10 year age difference? How could he be sure?

"Of course I do, Shu! I've never felt the same about anybody else!" Ryuichi said, but noticed the worried look on Shuichi's face. "O-oh... about Yuki, right?" Then his expression changed. "Shuichi, no offense, but I never really liked Yuki. He takes you for granted way too much, and there's a lot more special potential in you than he thinks he knows. You could have it so much better, Shuichi... you deserve so much more." He said.

"But, he..." Shuichi looked directly into Ryu's eyes. "He said that he loved me... But, I like you... I don't know what to do. What if he get's mad?" Shuichi said, still worried. _What if I break his heart?_ He though.

Ryuichi put both of his hands on Shuichi's. "Shuichi... it may be hard to figure out right now, but we can sort this out. You're gonna want to ask a lot of questions, but the true way to figure all of this out..." he put his hand on Shuichi's chest. "... is to just follow your heart." And he smiled.

Shuichi could feel his heart begin to beat faster. "You think so, Ryu?" She began to smile, knowing so easily that the path would lead him right to Ryuichi Sakuma.

Ryuichi nodded, smiling. He let his hand rest against Shuichi's chest, barely, just barely feeling his heart beating beneath his palm. "I know so, Shu."

Shuichi grinned happily. Now, beaming with joy. "Just one thing..." He said, a nervous smile on his face.

"What's that?" Ryuichi asked.

"Does this make us..." Shuichi knew that Ryuichu could fill in the blank. But he wanted to know so badly. So far, at leats, he knew he was a cheater. He was cheating on Yuki. But still...

"Lovers?" Ryuichi finished.

"Yeah..." Shuichi smiled, blushing a bit.

Ryuichi was about to continue, but then his cellphone rang. He picked it up, the caller ID being displayed as "unknown". He flipped the razr open.

"Hello?"

"Sakuma, you bastard, where the hell is Shuichi?!" Yuki yelled on the other line. Ryuichi paled.

"Mr. Eiri, Shuichi's here. You see, I-I'm a little sick, so he's helping me." He answered politely, trying to cover up his fear.

"What!? If you're a little sick, then why can't you take care of yourself? You're 31 years old, for God's sake! You act like some retarted 5 year old. Get your act together and tell Shuichi to get home pronto!" Yuki yelled on the other line, loud enough for the two to hear.

Yuki's words really hurt Ryuichi. He bit his lip, trying not to let any tears fall. He tried to think up a response but couldn't.

Shuichi put his head down for most of it. "I'm sorry, Ryu..." He whispered, pulling Ryuichi into a hug. He didnlt know what else to do, though. And it hurt, not only to see the hurt in his friend, but to feel the blow almost as hard. And to have failed Ryu. He was so sorry...

Ryuichi fell into the hug, but then pulled out quickly. He looked anxious, and then he glanced at Shuichi. "Should I tell him...?" He asked nervously.

Shuichi didn't look so confident either. "..No, please..." Shu whispered back. He couldn't imagine how Yuki would react, and he didn't want to know.

"But Shuichi... if you're scared of him, that's a bad sign... do you wanna talk to him? I'll put it on speaker... and I'll help you." Ryuichi said. "You really don't deserve this."

"No... Please, Ryu, no..." Shuichi felt goosebumps up his arms. He was scared, but he didn't want to face it. "Could you tell him that I'm going home now?" He asked quietly, looking sad. He just couldn't let Yuki know...

Ryuichi understood Shuichi's fear. "Yuki... Shuichi's heading home now. The traffic's thick, so it'll take him a while." Ryuichi said, hanging up the phone and setting it on the nightstand.

"Ryu, I'm sorry..." Shuichi bowed his head in shame. He still felt bad. He didn't want to leave Ryu alone while he was sick. But he didn't know how to please Ryu or Yuki... especially not at the same time.

"Shuichi... it's okay." Ryuichi pulled Shuichi into a hug, wishing that he could protect his friend against everything. "If you want to lay low here, that's okay. I told Yuki that it'd be a while before you got back. I know you're confused, but you're always welcome here. And if Yuki ever tries to hurt you, then come to me, Shuichi. Because I don't want to see you hurt."

"Ryu!" Shuichi put his head into Ryuichi's chest. "Don't say that, Ryu. Don't say that. Shuichi though, It only makes it harder to leave... "I'm sorry, really, I am!" he cried out, as if he hadn't said it before. But he had to tell Yuki sooner or later. He preferred later. "

Shh... you don't have to be sorry. It's okay... everything's gonna be okay, I promise. You don't even have to leave... you can just wait a little while, we can sort things out, it'll be fine." Ryuichi eased.

Shuichi let a few tears escape form his eyes. "You were right...." Shuichi muttered, "Should have told him..." He pulled himself away, wiping his eyes. "I got to go home now." He said. He was going to tell Yuki. And knowing that Ryuichi would be there for him, he didn't feel so afraid. "I'll come back." He promised.

Ryuichi nodded. "You can do it, Shuichi. I know you can."

Shuichi stood up, taking pride in himself. "But are you going to be okay? Does your tummy still hurt?" He asked, smiling a little.

Ryu blushed a bit. "A little, but I can manage." He admitted. "I'll be just fine. Don't worry."

"Okay," Shuichi headed slowly for the door, smiling at Ryuichi. "You look so cute when you blush. You know that?"

Ryu blushed even harder, holding Kumagoro to his chest. "So do you." He said, laughing a bit.

Shuichi grinned. "See yah in a bit." He promised, leaving the room and heading back to Yuki's place.

"Bye." Ryuichi fell back onto the bed, sighing. He turned on his side, and cuddled with Kumagoro, holding the plush to his chest. "I hope you'll be okay, Shuichi..."

Shuichi walked all the way home, shivering from the cold of the night. When he finally made it home, he felt like an icicle. His fault. "Yuki...?" He called out nervously, closing the door to the apartment behind him.

"Took ya long enough." Yuki said with anger in his voice. He smelled like beer.

Shuichi turned to face Yuki. "I'm sorry, Yuki..." He turned his head so the smell of YKW wouldn't be so strong. "Can we talk about... something?

"Ugh, oh God, what now?" Yuki groaned, tossing a can of YKW behind him.

Shuichi didn't think Yuki would understand. But still. "You might want to sit down first." He said quietly, eyeing the living room.

Yuki sighed, dragging his feet into the living room and collapsing into the recliner. "Hurry up and spill the -c- beans, brat." He said.

Shuichi sat down quietly. "It's about... us." Shuichi didn't even look at Yuki. He couldn't. How could he pretend that this wasn't what Yuki was like. But... "I don't think it will work out... I-I..."

"What makes you think that it wouldn't work out? Look at all that I've given you." Yuki fumed. "If this has anything to do with that sunnova -c- Ryuichi..."

"Yuki..." Shuichi bit at his lower lip, "I _like_ Ryuichi."

Yuki practically blew up inside. "What!?" He stood straight up. "Do you mean what I think you mean!? Shuichi Shindou, I cannot believe you!"

"Yuki! You're.. ugh!" Shuichi stood up too. "Yes, I like Ryuichi, and he likes me back! he treats me better than you ever did!" Shuichi just let out things from the top of his head.

Out of more rage ever felt before, Yuki slapped Shuichi across the face. Hard. "Get out. Get the fuck out of this house! You're not welcome here, you hear me?! I don't want to see your face ever again!!"

Shuichi's head had been pushed so he was looking away. A red mark was on his cheek. Without even checking his cheek, he looked up at Yuki with a sad face. He wasn't sure if he had done the right thing. A tear slid down his face, burning when it touched the slap mark, but before the tear got any further, Shuichi had ran out of the room. He would come back, though. he had to.

Yuki walked into the office, unsure of what he had done. He was still furious, but yet, he had no regrets, which made him that more terrible.

Shuichi took in the cold air as he closed the door. He was heading back to Ryuichi's place. He'd be back to Yuki's as soon as the author was out of the building so he could get his stuff out. He'd made Yuki really mad. It was so clear.

Ryuichi awaited Shuichi's return anxiously, contemplating calling Yuki later.

Shuichi locked Ryu's door after he had entered. And he did so queitly, looking into a mirror. The hand mark stood out like gold on purple. It still hurt. He tried touching it, but even the lightest touch still stung. He guessed he sort of deserved it. He had hurt Yuki... but he had left Ryu alone for to long now, though, and went down to Ryuichi's room.

"Shuichi, you're back!" Ryuichi said, delighted. "Did Yuki... get really mad...?" Ryu asked.

Shuichi kept his head down so most of his hair covered his face, but you could tell that he had nodded. "Yeah, he got really mad." She said queitly, walking over to Ryuichi.

Ryuichi pulled Shuichi into a warm hug. "Shu, you don't have to worry about him. I can go back and get your stuff for you once I get better, you know. You can move in with me if you wanna." He offered.

"Oh, I'll get my stuff," Shuichi said, still quiet. "But are you okay with me staying here? I mean, didn't you say you were running low on money? I'll be an onus." He said. He felt that he was doing well in covering his face for now. Oh well, he had a plan.

"Oh, not at all, I meant that because we didn't have anything offhand at the hospital. No, I've got plenty, with the band getting back together." Ryuichi said. "Actually, I'd be really happy if you stayed. I've been really lonely lately, and it'd make me really happy if you would stay with me."

"Thanks..." Shuichi stood up, pulling away and turning away. "It's getting kinda late. Would you mind if I turned out the light so we could get to bed?" Shuichi asked. At least, in the dark, Ryuichi wouldn't notice his face. But his feelings were defiantly damaged. And he didn't feel in the mood for anything right now.

"Yeah, that'd be nice." Ryuichi agreed. But there was something about Shuichi that worried him. "Shu... this is a hard situation... and... it's okay to cry."

Shuichi turned off the lights. He couldn't help but to think about what Ryuichi had said. He did want to cry. He sat on the edge of Ryuichi's bed, only bothering to take off his shoes, but he wasn't going to cry. Not yet. Not in front of friend. Lover. Ryuichi.

Ryuichi stretched, and then snuggled into a comfortable position on the bed. "Things will get better, Shuichi. G'night." He yawned, and then closed his eyes.

Shuichi layed down on the bed next to Ryuichi. He wanted to believe Ryuichi more than anything right now. Soon enough, he had fallen asleep and was in another dream.

Ryu couldn't sleep. He tried repositioning, pulling off the covers, putting the covers back on, but he couldn't fall asleep. His mind was still active... he worried about Shuichi. Let alone the cursed pain that just wouldn't leave.

Shuichi fell into a short dream, one were a concert had gone crazy. Pigs were flying above the audience, Hiro had dyed his hair hot pink, he and Ryu were singing child-songs and everyone in the audience was wearing orange socks. It was a good dream, actuaclly, because everybody was happy. But Yuki wasn't there. Even when he looked at Yuki's trademark-spot in the audience, there was no Yuki. But somehow, he was still happy. He couldn't understand how or why, but it still hurt.

Ryu, having given up on sleep, just contentedley watched Shuichi dream. He looked so adorable, even when he slept.

Shuichi's dream came to an end quickly. No big finalle, it just stopped. But he, somehow, slept through the rest of the night without waking up. He felt so much more comfortable sleeping beside Ryuichi. But after being with Yuki for so long... it felt weird.

After a while, Ryu finally felt his eyelids become heavy with sleep. He sighed contentedley, but then... oh God. Not again. Paling, he leaned over the bed and threw up for hopefully the last time that night. He was really getting tired of this. And on top of that, Shuichi was sound asleep! He didn't want to ruin that. He tried to be as quiet as possible, which only resulted in him straining more. Not a good idea.

Shuichi stirred in his sleep. Possibly, from the noise, maybe not. Maybe, subconsciously, he knew something was wrong.

Finished, but left with even more intense pain, Ryu squirmed back under the covers, trying to ignore the ache and sleep, or at the least, be as quiet as possible.

Suddenly, Shuichi felt like he was falling, still laying on his back, and awoke. Slightly sweating, breathing heavy, his heart pounding, he sat up in the bed, quickly turnign to Ryuichi, knowing something was wrong. "Ryu... are you okay...?" He whispered.

"S-Shu... I w-woke you up... I'm s-sorry..." Ryuichi said, turning on his side and curling up into a ball. He felt horrible, but he felt like he couldn't tell Shu without feeling somehow guilty.

"No, Ryu, is wasn't you!" Shuichi promised, still speaking quietly. He was now leaning closer to Ryuichi, so he could see him better. He'd forgotten his dream. "Are you feeling sick again?"

Ryu nodded, letting a tear run down his cheek. "Really... bad..."

"Ryu..." Shuichi was hovering over his friend, "You're crying!" Shuichi wiped his friend's tear away and reached for the phone. He didn't want to see Ryuichi like this. He was going to help him, any cost.

"But… the doctor said it was normal… I-I'll be fine, Shu…" Ryuichi said, struggling to even out his breath.

"Well," Shuichi brought the phone to his ear, already having the number dialed, "I don't think it should last this long. Or this bad." Shuichi didn't believe anything that bad should happen to Ryu.

Ryu looked at Shuichi. "... youre right..." he murmured.

---

the phone rang yet again. Dr. Nagaoto picked up the phone. "SakuraYama Clinic, Dr. Nagaoto speaking." She said in the same monotone voice.

"This is Shuichi again. Ryuichi Sakuma is still having problems, and I don't think it's been getting any better." Shuichi looked through the darkness at Ryu with the same concern in his face as before, "Is something wrong with him?"

"I understand. The Ipecac clearly has done its work, but in some cases, there are times when the medicine will begin to interfere with normal digestive activities. Now that the Ipecac has completed the task of sparing Mr. Sakuma from the food coloring, his body is functional of consumption. Don't start off with any solid foods, just stay with ice water and ginger ale. Acidic drinks, such as fruit juice or carbonated drinks are things to stay away from. On some medical forums, any outside comfort to the midsection is helpful. Light massage, lotion, any of the like. Mr. Sakuma should be well by tomorrow night at the latest." Dr. Nagaoto explained.

"Are you sure? I don't wanna hurt him." Shuichi asked, still looking at his poor friend.

"Trust me, Mr. Shindou. I may not appear to be experienced, but I've been through more than many cases that fare similarly to you and Mr. Sakuma's, but end with no trouble." The doctor replied calmly.

"Oh." Shuichi wanted Ryuichi to be okay again, though. And, apparently, he'd have to wait for that. "Thank you" He said before hanging up, placing the phone back where it origonally was. "Ryuichi, I'm going to spoil you." He said with a smile, leaving the bed in search for some lotion. He'd do anything for Ryuichi.

"Ne...?" Ryu looked in confusion, but a smile played at his lips.

Shuichi giggled, mangaging himself around in the dark with great skill. He came back with a sweet smelling lotion. But he kept the lights off. For more than the one reason you may be thinking of.

Ryu was confused, but whatever Shuichi was giggling about, he knew it must have been something worth a grin. He smiled.

"The doctor said you need to be comfortable." Shuichi said, climbing back in bed. He could just see Ryuichi in the dark. He came closer to him, opeing the lid of the lotion bottle.

"Ya... that makes sense." Ryu said, smelling the lotion. It smelled sweet.

Shuichi knew that the lotion was cold, but sort of forgot at first... He got closer to Ryuichi, getting under the covers and slowly making his way up Ryuichi's shirt, rubbing Ryu's stomach carefully.

The sensation felt heavenly. Ryu sighed contentedley, smiling as his eyes fluttered. "Oh, Shu... you're so smart..."

Shuichi slowly continue to rub Ryuichi's stomach. He smiled, knowing that Ryuichi hadn't rejected him. "Shh, you need sleep, okay...?" He whispered, his breath close enough to touch the back of Ryuichi's neck.

Ryu nodded, closing his eyes, finding sleep much more easy and approachable, thanks to his koi.

Shuichi's arm was holding Ryu close to his own body. He contineud to do what he could to comfort him. He closed his own eyes, too, snuggled up close to Ryu. He was slowly getting to know just how much older Ryuichi was, but that didn't bother him a bit. He really liked Ryuichi.

Ryu felt himself slowly drift off. He loved having Shuichi there, right next to him. All of that loneliness he felt before, he was so glad that it was gone. He felt loved, and in love.

Shuichi continued to hold Ryu close to him. Even as Ryuichi slept, he wanted to be closer to Ryuichi. And before Shuichi even fell alseep, he whispered, "I love you." To Ryuichi. It didn't matter if he didn't hear it. Because it was true.

As Ryu slept, he dreamed that he was on a cloud. It was high up in the sky, where the light pink and blue skies faded into the deep blue starry skies. He was sitting on the most soft matter imaginable, and he sat next to Shuichi. He dreamed that Shuichi leaned in next to him and whispered,

"I love you."

Shuichi fell into a dreamless sleep.

---

Shuichi moved a bit under the coveres, slowly realizing that it was morning. And also realizing that he was still snuggled up with Ryuichi, so he stayed still and quiet, so he wouldn't wake up Ryuichi.

Ryu's eyes slowly fluttered open, and his face went pink when he realized that he was right next to Shuichi. He assumed that they had slept all night together, but the term "slept all night" just made him think of... that. He blushed harder, shoving the thought out of his head. He actually felt quite a bit better, if not completely healed.

Shuichi closed his eyes again, resting his head on Ryuichi's back. He was wide awake, but didn't know if Ryuichi was. And he didn't want to disturb his sleep.

Ryuichi's curiosity got the better of him. "Shu...?" Ryuichi said softly and quietly.

Shuichi opened his eyes. "Yeah?" He whispered, smiling nervously.

Ryuichi smiled cutely, and wrapped his arms around Shuichi. "Wake up, cause the sun came all the way up just to see you."

Shuichi smiled, feeling much more secure in Ryuichi's arms. "Aww, Ryu..." Shuichi said, his face turning a light pink.

"Shu, thanks for all your help." Ryu said, smiling. "I feel a lot better today, thanks to you."

"You're not the only one who feels better." Shuichi teased, closing his eyes and hiding his face under his hair.

"Aww!" Ryu said, bringing up one hand and moving the hair out of Shuichi's face. "You should get a haircut, Shu. You've got such a cute face, why hide it?"

"Ryu!" Shuichi whined, keeping his head down. His face paled. He didn't know if the slap mar was still there or not.

"Shuichi... I can put some ointment on that mark and put a band-aid if you wanna. It might make it feel better and go away faster." Ryuichi offered.

"Oh..." Shuichi looked a little more depressed. "You noticed..." He felt so ashamed. "You don't have to, Ryu, it was my fault..."

"No, Shuichi. Don't be so sorry about it, it wasn't your fault. Besides, I don't like to see you hurt, cuz I know that thing hurts. I really wanna make you feel at home, so please, can I help you?" Ryuichi asked.

"Ryu..." Shuichi clung the front of Ryuichi's shirt, "Yes. Thank you, Ryu... thanks..." He said, and started to stain Ryuichi's shirt with his tears.

"Your welcome, Shuichi..." Ryuichi said as he held Shuichi protectively, resting his chin on his koi's head, stroking his back.

Shuichi cried into Ryuichi's shirt for awhile before looking back up into Ryuichi's eyes. His eyes were puffy and red from crying.

Ryu stared into Shuichi's violet eyes, wiping away a stray tear with his index finger. Then, he planted a soft kiss on Shuichi's forehead.

Shuichi sniffed a bit. "Thanks..." He said. Then his stomach growled. "Oh, uhm, what time is it?" He guessed it would be around breakfast, since they'd just woken up.

"Yer welcome." Ryu smiled, and reached out for his phone. He looked at the time, and it read 10:45 a.m. "Wow, I've never slept in this late." He said.

"Aww, but you were up really late last night." Shuichi said, smiling. "Can we go out for breakfast?"

Ryuichi's face lit up. "Oh, that'd be so much fun!" He grinned.

"Yeah!" Shuichi grinned happily. "But where should we go?" he asked, gazing up into Ryuichi's eyes.

"Hm... I dunno... do you know of any places?" Ryu asked.

"Uhm..." Shuichi looked deep in thought. "Uh... IHOP?" It was the only place that he could think of. And he and Yuki had never been there, so he wouldn't get any depressing memories...

"Oh yeah, that place is good!" Ryuichi said. "Should we get dressed and stuff? You can borrow some of my clothes if you need to." He offered.

"Oh, thank you!" Shuichi said, hugging Ryuichi. He looked so happy.

Ryuichi returned the hug cheerfully. "You're welcome!"

Shuichi grinned. "Wanna get dressed now?" He giggled.

"Sure! Come with me and I'll show you the closet so you can pick out your clothes." Ryuichi offered, climbing out of bed.

"Mhm hmm!" Shuichi nodded and followed closely behind his lover.

"Here we are!" Ryuichi said, opening the closet door, presenting his collection of clothing. He had everything from suit jackets, concert t-shirts, sleveless shirts, sweaters, tight jeans, slacks, regular blue jeans, and even some hats and sunglasses. "Take your pick. There's all sorts of combinations."

Shuichi looked at all the cloths. "Hmm, what do you think I should wear?" he asked, looking at Ryuichi.

Ryuichi thought for a while. "Oh, I know what you'd look cute in." He said. He looked through his clothes, and pulled out a black tee shirt with chibi faced cookies that said "make cookies, not war" and black, skinny jeans. Ryu smiled cutely as he help up the clothing.

Shuichi smiled. "Okay!" he said excitedly. "And what will you wear?"

"Hmm..." Ryu pondered this. After a minute, he pulled out a pair of skin-tight black and blue checkered jeans and a Metro Station shirt, grinning.

Shuichi covered his mouth and giggled. "Good choice!" He said, although he was still giggling.

"Kay, so where do you wanna get dressed?" Ryuichi asked. "Closet, bathroom, or bedroom?"

"I don't mind." Shuichi said, blushing a bit. "You choose." He smiled.

"Hm... I'll give you more room, so you can have the bathroom. I'll take the closet. Kay?" Ryu asked.

"Okay," Shuichi nodded, turning towards the bathroom. "I won't be long." He promised, cloths on his arm, he closed the bathroom door after he entered.

"Kay then." Ryu said, closing the closet door and getting changed. Shuichi changed quickly, rather used to wearing tight cloths. He examined himself in the mirror and fixed his hair with his fingers. And he got dressed faster than Ryu, by his observations, since he was alone in Ryu's bedroom when he walked back in.

After a few more minutes, Ryuichi finished getting changed. And for added decoration, he had put on a black lace choker with a sparkly Catholic cross as the pendant.

Shuichi quietly played with bits of his hair while waiting for Ryuichi.

After a few minutes, Ryu came out, smiling cutely. He glanced in the mirror, and then turned to Shuichi, grinning.

"Ne, Shu, we should put on guyliner!" He said excitedly.

"Huh?" Shuichi cocked his head in confusion. "What's that?"

Ryuichi giggled, and then pulled out pencil eyeliner. "It's eye decoration, silly!" He smiled. "It's eyeliner for guys! Guyliner! I'll put it on you since it's your first time, if you wanna." He explained excitedley.

"Yay!" Ryuichi carefully applied the liner to Shuichi's eyes, and surprisingly doing well. He had enough experience, as a popular singer, to know which makeup looked good and which just made them look gothic. "Iz done!" He smiled, capping the eyeliner.

Shuichi saw himself in the mirror and smiled, then giggled at Ryu. "We look funny!" He said in a laugh. In all truthfulness, they _did_. Then a mischevious smile spread across his lips, and a second later, he had his arms around Ryu's body, holding him close in a hug.

"Aww, kawaii!" Ryu squeaked, hugging Shuichi back and grinning. "I love you a lot, Shuichi." Ryuichi said this time a bit more serious, holding onto Shuichi lovingly.

"Ryu," Shuichi looked up into Ryuichi's eyes and said, "I love you more."

"I've never loved somebody like I love you right now." Ryu replied, gazing into Shuichi's violet orbs.

Shuichi could feel his heart beating faster. "I love you so much... I could do this!" He said, then leaned in and put his lips up against Ryuichi's.

Ryu was surprised at first, but then slowly relaxed into the kis. he wrapped his arms around Shuichi, holding him.

Shuichi leaned gracefully into the kiss. He was so close, he could hear Ryuichi's heart beating, or maybe it was his own. It didn't matter anymore. He loved Ryuichi, and nobody would change that.

Ryuichi wanted to stay embraced longer, but he felt his chest tighten as his face turned a light shade of red, then purple, then blue, then pink. He slowly pulled away, gasping for air.

Shuichi took a step back, and stared at his lover with fright and worry filling his eyes. He didn't hesitate to grab the phone, dailing the doctor's clinic again. "Ryu..." He whispered. He grabbed onto Ryuichi's hand and tried not to imagine Ryuichi suffocating, not knowing what to do. "Breath, please... breath..." He was so angry at himself for not knowing what to do. For not being able to help Ryuichi.

Ryu took a final gasp, sighed, cleared his throat, and looked at Shuichi. "Sorry about that, Shu. It was my first kiss, y'know, so I didn't know what to do." Ryuichi said, his normal color returning to his face, pardoning a slight blush. "I didn't know if I should pull away, or..."

Shuichi went wide eyes and dropped the phone. "Ryu!" He pulled Ryuichi into a hug, burrying his head into Ryu's chest. He was sobbing. He was scared. He didn't want to admit how he felt.

"Huh? Shuichi? Hey hey, what's wrong?" Ryuichi asked, a bit surprised by the sudden hug. He could feel the distress in his koi's voice, so he wrapped his arms around Shuichi lovingly.

Shuichi tried to nod yes, but only managed to smear his tears on Ryuichi's shirt. So, he looked up, and said, "Ryu...? You're alright?"

Ryuichi put on his trademark smile. "Of course I'm fine, Shu!" He said cheerfully. "But are you gunna be okay?"

"Yeah," Shuichi smiled lightly, "Now that I know you are."

"yay!" Ryu grinned. "Hey, we're all dressed an everything... you ready to go to breakfast?" ryu asked.

Shuichi brightened. He just remembered how hungry he was. "Yeah, let's go!"

"kay!" Ryuichi grinned, walking to the door. then he stopped, and turned to Shuichi. He held out his hand, asking if Shu would hold it on the way out to the car.

"Yes!" Shuichi grinned, taking Ryuichi's hand and holding it as tightly and carefully as possible, as if at all possible.

Shuichi walked out the front door, carefully to stay close to Ryuichi. "You looke so cute..."

"Ne, so do you!" Ryu said cheerfully.

"But you look so much cuter!" Shuichi argued playfully. But the grin faded when he looked down to his pocket, his own phone ringing. He used his free hand to take out the phone. The caller ID said 'Hiro' and the ringtone played out his favorite Nittle Grasper song. "It's Hiro..." He'd almost forgotten. He flipped open the phone and, "Hiro?" ... "Wait, what?" ... "Where?" ... "Oh. Okay. So, you're happy, right?" ... "Okay. Bye." He hung up the phone and put it on silent before hanging up. "It's nothing," He turned to Ryuichi, "Now, breakfast, 'kay?"

Ryuichi turned his head in confusion. "Everything okay?" He asked.

"Yeah, but I've gotta go to practice after lunch." He smield weakly, "Band needs me to." He continued towards the car, "Com'on!" He was grinning again by this point. Mischiviously.

"Oh. Okay then!" Ryuichi said, following Shuichi closely.

"So, you wanna drive or should I...?"

"Hm... rock, paper, scissors, winner gets to drive." Ryuichi said cutely.

Shuichi smiled and hit his fist on his palm three times, saying, "Rock, papper, siccors!" And ended up with 'paper'.

Ryuichi did the same, and ended up with 'rock'. "Decision is final!" He announced, smiling.

"Yay!" Shuichi grinned and hugged Ryuichi. And while doing so, he planted a kiss on Ryu's cheek before pulling away and heading towards the car. It was all pretty sudden, but he was truly very happy with how the two's relationship was beginning.

In the end, Shuichi was happy that he had picked Ryuichi over Yuki.


End file.
